My wife and I have been sleeping on 3" 20 ILD topper from FBM on top of a too-firm Stearns and Foster spring mattress for 3 weeks now.  It works fine for her (5'6", 125 lbs) but I often wake up stiff and sometimes have trouble sleeping due to pressure points, though I have had a few nights of excellent and comfortable slelep (I'm 5'10", 150lbs).  I'm a side sleeper with sacroiliac pain.  This topper seems more medium than soft in feel and I've put a cushioned mattress pad on top of it to try softening it up.  I've also tried putting a fiber-filled pad over the latext in addition or in place of cushioned mattress pad, but that doesn't provide enough back support.  I have only 5 days left before my 30 day trial period expires, so  I need to make a decision on whether to return it, which only makes sense if there's a better option. Is the 19ILD topper from Sleep Like a Bear noticeably softer than FBM 20 ILD?  Is 3 inches too thick?  Any advice would be appreciated.  Thanks.